I don’t know if anyone will ever read this. Maybe these pages will burn like the towns behind us, or get buried under rubble like the crops in front of us…
The sky is grey again, not from clouds, but from smoke. The smell of fire and iron clings to everything. I watched another soldier fall this morning. He was once our neighbour… He gave his last breath fighting for a hill we won’t even remember tomorrow.
And I can’t help but ask myself… what’s the point of all this?
Each explosion shakes the ground, but nothing seems to move the emptiness in my chest. The men around me hold their rifles like lifelines… They’re brave but they’re also scared. We all are.
Who wouldn’t be, when death walks louder than footsteps?
That’s when I wondered: What if I don’t make it out?
And then, just as quickly, another thought followed: What if this is not the end?
I’ve seen so much ruin, so much hate, but in the middle of it, something stirred. I realized I don’t just want to save lives from bullets and bombs. I want to save souls from the kind of death that goes deeper than the body. From the kind that lasts forever. There’s a war behind the war, one no one writes about. And I’ve seen too much to ignore it.
I still carry the wounded. But now, I do it with a purpose I didn’t have before. I want them to know there’s more than this blood-soaked earth. More than pain. More than fear.
There’s a kingdom untouched by fire. A place where mercy lives, and death doesn’t win. That’s where my heart is now.
I can’t stop this war but I can choose who I serve while I’m still here. And I’ve made my choice.
I’ll fight, not just for peace on earth, but for peace that lasts beyond it. I’ll love even when hate feels easier. Not because I’m fearless. But because I know this war will end. And when it does, some souls will still be searching. So if I can help even one person find that better country, a place where Christ reigns and sorrow doesn’t follow, then I won’t have died for nothing…
~ A soldier of Christ
Written by: Abigail Blessan
